Osiris Apocolypto

[John Ford]

Everyone knows me now, I've tried so hard. So hard to keep such a low profile, so no body would miss me if I died John thought to himself as he began to gaze at the rising sun. Now look at me, I have friends, but now- John's gaze wonder towards a man sleeping in his bed. Now I have someone special to me, someone I can call my own, my lover... Shadow John smiled at his lover and then returned to gazing at the sun rise.

But what happens, if something does happen? John poundered. What happens, if I die, or worse I become what I fear the most... Myself, Apocolypto God of the Hell and Osiris God of all Gods? John shook his head trying to get rid of these thoughts but they still lingered. I can't let that happen, not to Shadow John felt the tears. "I cry to much" John mumbled. It's because you hold so much pain John cried some more to let the tears fall and hopefully stop.

I would kill Shadow if I turned this sudden thought literaly almost gave John a heart attack nearly making John colapse unto the ground. Breathing heavily John realized I have such a powerful connection with him, nothing that I have ever experienced before, I am nothing without my Shadow, I need him... John smiled slightly. As long as I don't turn I should be fine, and so will my world... Shadow...

John moved slowly to the bed and took a chest. Slowly he opened it to look at the pictures and files and notes about Shadow and of them.

[Shadow Cooper]

"goddess what have I become." he thought outloud to himself looking at the tree tops of the forrest as he walked.
"Why have I become so attached to somone else, that someone will be the reason i end my eternal life forever!" he wasn't angrey but thoughtful as he kept walking through the forrest he licked the stray blood from his fingers after a good hunt or centaur not as nice as full human it was like take away junky food to Vampire half blood tainted humans, but still it tasted good.
"It's not fair on John even when i know we share equal amounts of love i can not always be there for him." Shadows eyes now where fixed shamfully to the forrest floor.
"I might be there physically, but I can not always be so open if i were i'd probley kill him, thats what monsters do they kill anyone and everyone around them close best friends or lovers it happens." he hated himself as always walk slowled.
"I want to be there for John forever i want hinm to be here for me i need him to be...but i am dangrous to him i could one day forget my place and siriously put a and to him." a tear almost surgured from his black/brown rimmed eyes.
Shadow quickly wiped it away, don't cry last thing you need to do is give John a reason to question him.
mkaing sure no blood covered his body he put on a casual smile and entered Johns cave.
eyes skimmed it and spotted John laying on his belly on the bed, he grinned and walked over flopping onto the bed beside him a arm creapt round Johns hip and pulled him closer to Shadow side by side.
"what are you looking at my love?"
he asked and in his mind concluded.
"even if i might be dagrous to him i will never leave my John, he is my heart, my love, my disire and the only thing i have in this world."

[John Ford]

What are you looking at my love? John smiled and revealed his contants. "Pictures, notes, letters just stuff" John looked at his ring. "And the ring you gave me" John smiled. "I want you to know I love you" John said his eyes pleading. "I don't want anything to happen I want you to know that, but I want you to also know..." John paused and placed his head next to Shadow's. "Don't hesitate to leave when you have too... I don't want anything to happen to you" John said. "I couldn't bare it if something did happen" John said.

"Something is comming Shadow" John's eyes opened. "And I think I have something to do with it" John continued. "The sun bleeds and the Raven's eyes are becoming more apparent. And I don't like it" John said. "These are the exact signs just before" John chocked at his next setence. "Just before I turned"

[Shadow Cooper]

"Pictures, notes, letters just stuff" "And the ring you gave me" .
"oh thats ok then." he kissed Johns temple and glanced at a picture of a dnacing John he smiled Shadow had bee standing there but hadn't of shown up somthing in his chest tightened and he ignored the feeling looking back at John as he spoke.
"I want you to know I love you" "I don't want anything to happen I want you to know that, but I want you to also know..." "Don't hesitate to leave when you have too... I don't want anything to happen to you" "I couldn't bare it if something did happen"
Shadow laughed and storked his hair,
"where is this coming from John i know all this but there will never be a leaving for me." he smiled towards John and then listened to Johns final sentence.

"Something is comming Shadow" "And I think I have something to do with it" . "The sun bleeds and the Raven's eyes are becoming more apparent. And I don't like it" "These are the exact signs just before" "Just before I turned
Shadow stared at Johns eyes when they opened and look sirious a frown crickled his forhead listening.
"John..." he sighed picking his words carfully.
"I do not care if you turn or what you do or become just as long as you are still my John, if you do turn and..." his voice craked and he took a breath to stop it.
"If you kill me." there said it."I would rather be dead then living knowing you no longer love me or that my John is gone." he stared into Johns eyes,
"you said you have been down that path before but you managed to break free and become yourself again, I'll help you still be human and yourself no matter what there is always more then one choice and sides of poeple somtimes it just takes time and risks to fimnd those options."

[John Ford]

you said you have been down that path before but you managed to break free and become yourself again, I'll help you still be human and yourself no matter what there is always more then one choice and sides of poeple somtimes it just takes time and risks to fimnd those options.

John thought about it for a moment. "Yes that's true... But it gets more difficult every time I do turn" John said. "I don't know if I can battle it again. Shadow I'm scared what if--What if I can't fight it off!"

[Shadow Cooper]

"Yes that's true... But it gets more difficult every time I do turn" John said. "I don't know if I can battle it again. Shadow I'm scared what if--What if I can't fight it off!"
"here we go with the negatives again." Shadow sighed and flopped restlessly onto the bed staring up at the ceiling his fingers drumming on shadows stomach picking words.
"You know the scariest thing in the world to ANYONE is themselves." he said slowly still picking his words,"to me to random people to yourself, only you know what you are fully capable of and only you know if you are strong enough to defeat your greatest fears." still picking Shadow wasn't good with encouragement speeches.
"John only you can hold yourself back and only you can push yourself forward you are capable of holding yourself together if you wish to do so not to give up and be taken over by something else when that something other is also you just not the same side." he hoped he was making sense now.
'people have different sides to them it's just your choice in which to bring out.' that seemed to be a better way of putting it.
now fully sitting up and hugging John he kissed Johns shoulder,
"I know your frightened of giving in to something you might not be able to control yet but I'll help you in anyway." he continued to hold John only feeling love at this moment.

[John Ford]

"I know your frightened of giving in to something you might not be able to control yet but I'll help you in anyway." Shadow said. John let him hold him. Then with a quick gesture John found himself geting up and slowly heading towards the door. "I'm going out Shadow, I don't know how long I'll be out, maybe for a couple of hours but please don't follow" and with these words John departed.

John made quick pace thinkin deeper and deeper. "You have Shadow now John he'll help" she said. John shook his slightly, "Just don't want to see him get hurt, I know what I'm capable of and its not nice" with this John fell silent moving quickly through the forest.